March 3 is National “If Pets Had Thumbs Day.” If your dog had opposable thumbs, what kind of shenanigans would they get into? I’m sure they’d use thumbs as an excuse to somehow get closer to you, increase the amount of food in their life, and get outside.
Let’s explore some possible scenarios. If a dog had thumbs, they would…
1. Open the fridge for a snickety snack
Forget waiting for the human to decide when the dog gets a snack. With thumbs, they’d open the fridge whenever they wanted to get a treat. They’d also go for the good stuff, probably right for the bacon.
2. Text their friends
If a dog had the chance, they’d text their friends to come over, meet up, or just chat. I bet they’d be big fans of video chat. The days of waiting for humans to come home from work to get some attention are over.
3. Hitch a ride to the dog park
Whenever they felt like it, a dog would let themselves outside and stick their thumb out to hitch a ride all the way to the dog park. They’d love to make new friends along the way!
4. Manage their own Instagram account
Finally, pups have a say over what stays (and goes) on their IG! No more embarrassing pictures or captions. A dog with access to their own IG account would post only the most flattering pictures.
5. Open doors
Days of privacy for the humans are over if anyone ever had them to begin with! The doggos would burst into any room they felt like, including the doors that lead outside. Did someone say OUTSIDE?
6. Buy more pet toys online
Dogs would feel like they didn’t have enough pet toys and must order more online. Furry friends would steal credit cards and log in to a laptop to purchase their favorite toys. We bet they’d like ZoZo’s Paw toys!
7. Up their fetch game
If pooches had thumbs, they’d say goodbye to traditional fetch. Maybe it’d be a combination of the ball in mouth and ball in hand. They’d take advantage of the fact that they could throw now.
8. Peruse Google
Pets probably have so many questions they’d love to ask Google. Why does mom have to go to work? Why doesn’t the cat get a job? Why do the humans get a whole pizza, but I get one scoop of food? They’d get so many answers to their questions!
9. Steal your back scratcher
It’s a known fact that Fido loves their back scratched, so what if they could do it themselves? If someone had a back scratcher at home, they’d most definitely borrow it to get to that one spot.
10. Give you the thumbs up
Dogs are affectionate and loving. They’d take this chance to let their owner know in another way that they’re doing a great job with a good ole thumbs up!
What kind of shenanigans would your dog get into? Which one of these scenarios was your favorite? Let us know @zozospaw.